Monday, August 25, 2008

On My Own

I just finished reading a really good book that was praised by people far more distinguished than I. (this includes the entire Tri-state area)

Eve Ensler, the author of The Vagina Monologues called Florence Falk's On My Own: The Art of Being A Woman Alone " "A call to independence and empowerment" See what I mean? I said it was "a really good book."

Amy Sohn, author of Run Catch Kiss and My Old Man wrote, "On My Own is a provocative, smart read for any woman who is alone, wants to be alone, or is figuring out how to be alone. An empowering, emotionally honest book that is long overdue." (from the library?)

Before I was virtually alone (not cyberspace virtually) I wasn't aware how many woman as Vanessa Williams sang have, "One less egg to fry." I love these lyrics. The line "one less man to pick up after" gives me the chills. It's so simple while it says it.

I'm a little confused about the title, though. "One Less Bell To Answer" - Why would your husband be ringing the bell? Wouldn't he have a key?

Anyway, finding your own situation in others is an old story. When you're shopping for lamps you notice lamps. In the market for a white car? Every car on the road is white. Thinking of joining a cult? Suddenly, everyone is wearing moccasins. It's a phenomenon.

Yesterday's New York Times Modern Love column in the Style Section had a line that jumped out at me (not literally) Bob Morris, the author wrote about marrying his boyfriend now that gay marriage is an option. He writes: "As someone who has been a defensive single most of my adult life, I still believe that solitude makes you a deeper person, not a lesser one."

While I was skimming, I mean reading Ms. Falk's book I nodded (off to sleep?) ...in agreement that I could truly become deeper simply by reprogramming my feeble brain to believe that
it's possible to befriend aloneness.

This goes against my claims as Dr. Friendship that "If you're your own best friend you need to get out more." I've staked my illustrious (or lack luster) career on the platform - "Hugging oneself may be good for the soul, but bad for the back." Let's face it. It's an awkward position.

I've always laughed at that love yourself first crap, but now that I have no choice (I have one less bell to answer) it may be time to look in the mirror and smile.