“I wish we had danced more” was one of the last “we” things Jimmy ever said to me. One of the first “I” things I did after he died was to take dancing lessons. Until recently that didn’t occur to me as odd. I hadn’t actually put it together.
Dancing is so wonderfully romantic and sexy. For a long time when I heard a ballad, any song that could be slow danced to I pictured and actually felt myself dancing to it with Jimmy.
A few days ago I saw the episode of “Glee” where the widow and widower on the show get married. As I watched them dance at their wedding I glided along with them in my mind. In my fantasy, I'm fabulous but in real life even after dancing lessons I'm klutzier than Elaine in Seinfeld.
Still, I felt swooped up and dizzy with the anticipation of falling in love and being swept away in a faceless man’s arms. Does ‘faceless’ mean I’m no longer reaching out to Jimmy? I think so and I think this is good.
If I put myself out there maybe one of these days I’ll be stepping on somebody’s toes again.
Put yourself out there! You are too fabulous not to rock some magical man's world. Next time I see you I'll tell you about Billy's 'goofey dance'!ReplyDelete